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Is there a way to remain a sane army wife-hermit while living in Uijeongbu, South Korea?

This isn't a clinical issue I'm dealing with here, but I'm rather HIGHLY unhappy and uncomfortable with people. Especially english speaking people. Back at home in Virginia I rarely left my house, wouldn't even stop my car to get gas if it meant seeing a living soul, and was rather quite content hiding in my home safe and unbothered by people's words and thoughts.. Well a bit before I came over to join my husband, here in Korea, I was outside of a gas station hiding in a friend's jeep, waiting for him to come back with some alcohol (no worries I'm of age, just petrified of public) when I noticed two people speaking rapidly. I went to "freak out", when I soon came to discover that they were in fact not speaking any English and then I became immediately calm and delighted with the idea that I had no idea what they were carrying on about.. so the very idea of being in a foreign country where no one would understand me and vice versa, was VERY exciting! Then I get here, and discover that I was right! I love walking around this city, I love seeing Korean people ignoring me left and right...then BAM, there's Camp Red Cloud. The place that we (my husband and I) unfortunately have to venture to more often than not and it's pretty unbearable. I feel like I'm back home and scared again. To make it worse it seems like everyone we meet, *shudder* other couples are constantly bombarding us with, "Oh we won't let you stay cooped up in that apartment all day! You'll have to come out to see the city, you'll hang out with other army wives! Here, here get our number!" And I grip my man's hand, grit my teeth, and shout things in my skull. Things that are irrational when these people are just trying they're best to comfort me in this "hard" adjusting time. I'm doing just fine. Whose to say who I am and that I want anything to do with anyone? I didn't come here to be with the strangers that surround my husband and his job. I came here to see him and hide away from all that was America, in our lovely unfurnished apartment! I would like to know if I'm killing myself mentally or is it possible that all of the people I've turned down and ignored countless times have no idea who I am and how I can be? As I write this I feel immature and rude, but please, hidden Americans in South Korea, hear my/read my words and tell me if you've been hiding as well??

Public Comments

1. You're my hero. Don't hold yourself to anyone elses standards.
2. Just don't go out if you are so incapable of dealing with people. Can't you just continue to refuse? Better yet.. get some therapy. You might want to ignore the fact that you need it, but you have a serious problem if you are that sensitive about having relations with other human beings. It's nice and safe to be anonymous and ignorant, but obviously you ARE running from something. Maybe that should be fixed instead of running away constantly? Maybe you'll feel a little less burdened.
3. I have to say this is an interesting story. I was stationed in Camp Stanley about 15 minutes away from CRC in Uijeongbu for about 3 years. My wife is Korean actually, and we did have housing off post near the camp. She was also the similiar to you, she had no interest in conversating with Americans or any Koreans that lived near there. She didn't come out of the house often, and she often went to her hometown to stay with her parents. Eventually she kept pressuring me to try to move to a different Post, maybe down in Seoul, or Pyeongtak. However, at that time no other units were looking for MP's in those areas. Then I checked around Stanley, and found out the PX was hiring, so I asked my wife is she wanted to work there, and she at first said no, but then she gave it a shot. She was making money, getting out of the house, and meeting some other workers there. It gave her a new impression of people in general, and she became more comfortable with people in the area we lived in. I think that you should try to get a part time job on post. Associating with people at work can sometimes be good for those who are usually quiet on the outside. Give it a shot, and see what you can do. Check the PX, the Daycenter, places around CRC that might hire spouses with SOFA status. Another idea would be to take a tour around Korea. There's alot more to Korea then Uijeongbu City, and CRC. I didn't take my first tour until almost a year after I got here, however after I did, it opened my mind up more, and made me want to venture out more.